Me and my dad aren’t really good at sharing emotions,
just a hang up for us. But we are learning. Pam I hope you are reading this and
make sure dad does too. Hopefully it gives him some insight into how I look at
him.
Dear Dad,
Since we started communicating again I have learned a lot
of what has gone on in the past as well as what goes on behind closed doors
with the family. And, I know you wanted to keep me safe from that part of the family
but I would rather be in 100% with you and help you shoulder the burden it can
be at times. I’m sorry I caused you so much pain as a teenager. It wasn’t you
it was feeling isolated socially that made me run to Portland. And, that wasn’t
the best choice for e academically. And, yes I have some problems, but you
raised a respectable sun that does his best to run his household responsibly. I’m
working on doing better than you did like you hoped I would someday. I hope to
make you proud eventually.
I know you worked a lot when I was a kid because you
thought that was what you thought that was the right thing to do as well as you
like to keep busy. Me I just wanted my dad around to spend time with. But, I do
understand why you did what you did. I also get that you were trying to do with
your encouragement method though I pat on the back would have helped me with.
But I get it now. I hope you can understand that sports were never really my
thing. I’m a geek/nerd. I’m into Science Fiction and Fantasy type stuff. Like
tabletop games and computer games. I tried to do well in sports to impress you,
but never could quite get it to fit me.
I get that you wanted me to follow in your footsteps
during high school, but I just couldn’t handle the stress. I’m sorry for that.
I might have done better with a work from home job as well as studying who
knows. But I am glad I worked at Beech Ridge while I did in the summer time. It
taught me a valuable skill. That being how to deep fry without a timer. I also
want to thank you for helping me be able to work with the Drama Club on the
plays I worked on. It was a rewarding experience and I learned a few things as
well. Yes, I was bullied in school but thought I had to stand up for myself to
fix it. Didn’t want you to have to save my butt every time.
It worked out in the end. We may clash at times I’m not
going to lie. But I am glad you are my dad and I am proud to have you as my
dad. I know you don’t get why I want to spend time with you completely. But, it’s
because I know I only have you for a limited amount of time and I want to make
the most of it. Whether it is BBQs or going to the races or just sitting around
telling stories. And, trust me that visit when Matthew and his wife were up
that we spend the whole time sitting around telling stories meant a lot to me.
It was even great when you and me sat watching tank
builders building tanks. And I will gladly come watch races with you, but I am
bringing something else to do during the less interesting parts of it. Just so
I don’t annoy you when you are into it more than me. And, you are definitely
invited over for football this fall. I didn’t get a chance to tell you, but I
am getting cable. And, I wrote this for the public to see dad because I want
them to now I am proud of you and thankful for the things you have done for me.
Even though I know I can be a pain in the butt.
I’ll wrap this up though since I know you aren’t as into
reading as me. Just wasn’t a favorite thing of yours as it was mine. So feel
free to leave comments and questions. And, everyone is welcome to share this.
As for me I am going back to the
grindstone with more writing and studying. *Tips his hat and walks slowly out
the door. *
heartfelt very nice!
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